last updated June 3, 2020
Sex is usually a favorite topic. But, it can be painful if you have prostate problems!
It is a physical need, like sleeping or eating, or breathing. For a healthy male, regular release of the prostate fluid is necessary to maintain good prostate health. Orgasm (ejaculation) is much like eating. One of the most pleasurable necessities of life! (OK. You may rate this pleasure above eating!)
But, just like eating, if you overdo it, you suffer. If you overdo it all the time, you get weak, and sick, and you die young. It's true.
It is one of the rhythms of your life. Like your heartbeat, your breathing, your eating, your sleeping...It requires moderation and a regular rhythm for best results. This is something we are not taught as young men. But, it would be a good and important thing to teach.
You function best and most healthfully when: Your heartbeat is calm and regular. Your breathing is deep and even. You sleep long enough each night. You eat the right amount on schedule.
Doesn't it make sense that the same would hold true for your love life?
In a woman, it is easier to see the rhythm. The monthly cycle of ovulation and menstration.
Yes, it's true!
The difference is: the time frames in our cycles are much more individual and varied than a woman's.
If you are healthy, you produce a certain amount of sperm and semen in a regular period of time. Some men make a lot rather quickly. Some men take a lot longer to make a full supply.
Once your body has created a full supply of semen and sperm (specific to each individual) it needs to release it. That is when you get very amorous or "horny" (in common language!). After you ejaculate, your cycle starts again.
The length of that cycle is determined by genetics, age, what you eat, and general health.
If you are healthy and enjoy sex within your own personal natural rhythm:
You just won't be having it as often. But, the male reproductive system keeps on functioning if you are healthy. (Nature does have a plan!)
If your are sexually obsessed, or if you are using it as a drug (to compensate for other things), you absolutely and surely will get prostatitis, and/or heart disease, and/or become impotent.
I'll explain why for each of these:Overindulgence:
This is one of the two main reasons for the prostate gland problem referred to as "non-specific prostatitis". Translated, this means: Your doctor, after giving you a thorough prostate exam, doesn't know why you are suffering. And, he'll tell you that.
And, that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you, or, that you are any less virile. Just not everyone can do it.
Of the first 10,000 that finish the race, 9,995 are not as fast as the guys from Kenya. That's just the way life is!
Sex is no different.
Our culture emphasizes the absolute need to "do it" all the time. You are made to feel unmanly if you don't perform all the time. That's insane! Also unnatural. And, it is physically and psychologically debilitating to a man.
You must make your prostate health come first. Then your intimate time will always be a pleasure.
When you have too much (Yes. There is such a thing!), you don't give your body adequate time to regenerate and recharge. And, you drain out too many nutrients from your system.
Your prostate and will try to keep up with this excessive demand (your prostate produces the seminal fluid that the sperm travel in). But, with overuse, your prostate can become inflamed and swell in the process.
This enlarged prostate condition is a very painful form of "non-specific prostatitis". It can become chronic.
Even young men in their late teens and early 20s suffer from this type of prostatitis.
If that is what is causing your prostate problem, your best prostate treatment is "doing it" less. Even not at all, until things feel better.
Heart Disease: Overindulgence here weakens your heart. It's true. This is a concept not generally understood in Western Medicine. In Eastern Medicine, this is very ordinary knowledge and has been written about in Chinese medicine for thousands of years.
I'll explain: Your organs all work together in harmony. When one is weakened the rest are affected. They actually support each other in function. Like a happy family! And, just like in a family, when one member is especially cranky or upset, the whole family is affected.
In Chinese medicine, the heart is supported directly by the kidney or "Kidney Power" (your adrenal glands).
When you are having too much sexual activity, you exhaust your Kidney Power (in Western terms, you fatigue your adrenal glands). When your adrenals are chronically low (low Kidney Power), your heart loses strength. If Kidney power is always low, your heart weakens.
The weaker your heart gets, the harder it is for it to perform it's function of pumping blood throughout the many miles of blood vessels in your body.
When your heart becomes too tired or weak, you get a heart attack. (Not all heart attacks are caused by clots and cholesterol deposits!)
The stories of older men dying, trying to keep up with the sexual needs of their 20 or 30 year old mistress, are not myth or fable or unusual bad luck. It is much more common than you might realize.
Impotence: Sperm and semen require a lot of specific nutrition. Some of these nutrients include Zinc, Omega 3 Fats, vitamin Vitamin E. All of those nutrients are sadly lacking in the common Western diet. This has a majorly adverse effect on prostate health!
Your body does not want to make bad sperm. It tries to make perfect sperm all the time. When it can not (most often because it does not have the essential materials, ie: nutrients) it shuts down. You become impotent.
Overindulgence uses up the required nutrients faster than you can replenish them. Even if you are consuming enough nutrients, your prostate requires a certain amount of time to recuperate and produce semen.
Eventually, when you have depleted your prostate and testicles enough, you will become impotent until your body can replenish itself again. If you do not replenish your system adequately, your "love life" is over. Permanently.
So, how come you could have so much when you were 18 and feel just fine?
First, that is the design of nature. At 30 or 40 you will destroy yourself sexually if you try to keep that up. By 50, you know the thought of that much is now ridiculous.
That does not mean you can not have wonderful exciting sex beyond 50! You just can't have it as often.
Viagra®, Cialis® and the other sexual enhancement drugs? You're whipping a tired horse. You'll have to keep whipping it harder and harder. If you make it keep running that way, eventually you'll beat it to death. And, you'll risk heart attack, stroke and/or blindness in the process.
The right amount depends on your own body. No two men are exactly alike.
It depends on your genetics. And, what you eat. How well you sleep and exercise are important. So is stress management. Highly stressed men almost always develop sexual problems. For them, impotence is common.
If you are in generally good health, this is the rule of thumb for frequency in Chinese medicine:
The only way to find out what is right for you is by trial and error. Count the days between ejaculation. Keep spreading the time further apart until inflammation and pain no longer occur.
In my own case, when I was 20, I was doing it almost daily. Today, at 54, about every 4 to 5 days is ideal.
Do I always keep "on schedule". No. Absolutely not. Spontaneity is important in life. I usually try to stay in rhythm. But, sometimes I'll have it 3 times in 2 days.
When I do that, I find I need about 7 to 10 days to recharge fully. When I used to get stupid, and just kept having as much sex as possible, I got prostatitis. Like clockwork.
I don't like prostatitis. It hurts! I don't enjoy the pain. So, normally, I keep to my schedule. If I am totally inspired and have extra sex, I take more days to recharge afterward. When I keep to my own bodys rhythm, I never suffer!
And then, you must keep to that rhythm!
As you grow older, the rhythm will change. That does not mean anything is wrong with you. That is just the way nature works.
One more very important point:
You wouldn't go to the gym and start out lifting the heaviest weight possible as fast as possible. Would you? That idea is ridiculous, isn't it? You know you would tear or injure something that way. Right? You warm up first. You get the blood moving and the muscles warm.
Why do men think sex is any different? Why do so many men think they can just get hard and go to it as fast as possible? That's insane! You are just begging for prostatitis that way.
How come you could do that in your teens? You could because you were in your teens.
At least 20 to 30 minutes of good foreplay (with an erection) will warm everything up real nicely! You'll get a great increase of blood to all your sexual apparatus. This will energize your entire male system. You'll perform better, you'll feel better, you'll recuperate better, and you'll be healthier.
The nicest part is, your partner will think about you differently! She'll treat you much better in and out of bed. It's an amazingly nice benefit for both of you!
If you don't have a partner, read (or, enjoy the pictures in) a sexy men's magazine. Enjoy the anticipation! You won't damage yourself this way.
You'll be sexy and enjoying sex well into your 80s!